The Exciting Part, and the Not so exciting

Starting off right???

I have started the first day off right. I noticed that the most used pink lipstick is my MAC Angel, naturally. That color is beautiful, and everyone should own such a nice color. I mean even that fabulous slut Kim Kardashian loves it. ALSO, I had this sample of Stila One Step Makeup, and its FABBBB. Its in the color DARK - which is a a shade too dark for me, but it'll do for just a test run. It feels really good on my skin. It blends like a dream. Its about medium buildable coverage, but maybe it has that coverage cause its darker than my actual skin tone. The price is 44.00 and Dropping 44 big ones is a BIG deal.



I'm obsessed with the Illamasqua blushes that I bought off of two blog sales. They are UHHH-MAIZZ-ING! I bought the Wonder Woman MAC blushes around the same time, and to be honest I haven't worn them. I just took 'em out of the box, and depotted one to put my MSF in it lol. Its a pretty compact! What can I say?!?

I'm trying to see how the eff I should style these damn bangs but I think I am failing hahaha. And on a disgusting note my scalp has been extremely dry. I feel like AHHH!

Eyes:
MUFE Aqua Cream #1 as a base in the outer corner
Urban Decay Naked Palette :)

• Lid : Toasted
• Crease : Naked
• Outer V : Dark Horse
• Highlight : Virgin

MAC Feline eyeliner

Face
Stila One Step Foundation
Benefit Gilded pencil as a highlight
Illamasqua Thrust Blush
Benefit Hoola Bronzer

Lips:
MAC Angel Lipstick

Makeup Resolutions for 2011

I know its about to be March, but I need to put some goals down via typing in cyberspace. I want to tackle makeup this year because I spend excessive amounts of money on it. I tend to repurchase the same thing in different packaging, or things that are VERY similar to each other.

Ok so here it goes

1. No More Pink lipstick. I have ENOUGH! Whenever me and Luisa go to MAC she says, "OF COURSE you bought that one...its PINK" Its true, same shit different name.
2. No more pink blush, I have 7 different ones, and I have fallen in love with my Illamasqua ones. That's all I need thats pink.
3. I have to finish 2 lipglosses within the year. B2M the rest.
4. Stop buying lipgloss, no matter how pretty it looks!
5. No more mascara until I'm done with all my stash. I have about 5 still in packaging.
6. Finish/Hit pan on at least 6 more things this year (not including the 2 lipglosses. In the year I have already hit pan and/or finished 4 things, I had hit pan once and finished a MSF previously...but that took FOREVER. Saying that, Its taken me 3 years to finish 6 things out of the insane amount I already have.
• Things on this list are : a pink or nude lipstick, Bare Minerals foundation should be done by summer, NARS sheer matte should be done in a month, Smashbox HD concealer should be finished in the month or less as well, any mascara, & Urban Decay eyeliner in zero

I don't

I hate when I have inner dialogue about make believe conversations that will never happen. As if I were a masochist reopening wounds that need not be reopened.

If I die tomorrow, he will never know how much I loved him, and if he knew, would he even care? I bet he would think I am a psycho with no sense.

I feel like I'm abnormal. I long for a normal life with normal things, normal people, and normal feelings. I am behind on life. I haven't graduated. I don't have a significant other. I don't have a significant other and a child. I don't even think I will get married. I don't think I will even have a child.

its hard not being able to speak to anybody honestly about the way I feel. I've worked extremely hard to keep a hard outer shell. I don't know, maybe I don't want anybody to think that I am weak and frail.