lets reverse to 2004-2007...i was with Aaron, and i honestly thought he was the love of my life. I honestly thought that he loved me the right way. When in actuality, he was douchebag asshat who would manipulate me in any way possibly for his personal gain. After graduation, right before he went to bootcamp, he asked me to marry him, and i said no mainly because im a girl and i want a big wedding.
We kept talking about it for the next couple of years (eventhough he was already married). I would fantasize about how life would be...and if i think about it today it wouldnt be a fantasy it would be a downright nightmare.
So, marriage looks like a far off ffffaaaaarrr off. I dont even think theres even a match for me at this point. I cant imagine getting along with anybody on that level. Its been 9 months and I dont remember what its like to care for somebody. Im too awkward...too weird...too fat? lol the only one i want is who knows where and is definitely not missing me.
I dont even wanna even be knocked up. Its so difficult to have a child, to put your needs aside for theirs. Life is essentially over if you want to be a RESPONSIBLE parent, unlike other people i know who think the party should keep on going.
So NO i dont feel left out.
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