I woke up at 245 pm today I was pretty tired. I wanted to sleep more but I don't know I felt that if I was asleep anymore my mom would come and she would be mad at me or something. I've been really tired lately. I blame it on my anemia, but whatever maybe its just my laziness. I'm kinda scared that I might have to get glasses. That sucks ass! I don't want to get glasses. I look horrible in them. I don't think I would ever find glasses that would be right for me.
At 125 am next day
Just watched the Incredibles, finally after like 3 days of having it here. I feel as if I am traumatized. Ever since…well I don't know when it was before I saw finding Nemo. I dunno. I start crying about things on TV. The real things, the fake things, it doesn't matter I still cry. I don't know what't is going on with me. Maybe it is a hormonal imbalance. My period hasn’t been good for about a year and a half now. I don't care. More time for the beach. I Kinda want to cry. I want to do something about something. I feel useless.
Today I cleaned the living room and put up the dishes. I broke a sweat. Yes I know this is weird…me cleaning? Me breaking a sweat? The world is going to end lol. I'm just playing. So yeah, I dunno but I had this feeling like arrrgghhh!!! Its so damn dirty! Lol. The place hadn't been vacuumed in a while. It used to get vacuumed every day. Fuck it everybody is just too caught up with their own shit that nothing is getting taken care of.
Its 133 and I want to go to sleep but it just feels as if I'm supposed to wait for something. Like if I can't go to sleep yet because…because of something that I'm still not aware of. But probably its just my mind acting kinda funny with me. Sometimes I get weird feelings but nothing really happens. Like the time a black cat crossed our path when it was raining really hard. Or when my mom was in China town and she wouldn't hurry up (I was like 8, but I still remember). Its funny how I remember retarded things lol. But they are really clear as if they just happened now. I can't say yesterday cause I rarely remember stuff that happened yesterday unless I concentrate.
But what has really bored me is my dreams. Its like I can't tell my dreams from reality. I've been dreaming things that have actually happened or are close to something that is going to happen. Its just too weird for the things I dream to actually come true. I thought that it was just something that you know was just a coincidence the first couple of times, but now I can't tell the fuckin' difference and its REALLY getting me scared. What if I dream something really bad and it come true. I don't dream nonsense anymore like I used to. These dreams seem really real. But I think I will keep hush hush cause people will probably think that I am crazy or something. Not that people don't already think that I am already off.
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